Flowers for Mom

May 10 2025

Filly had gone to visit her mom and was on a walk with her mom throughout the neighborhood. Filly was telling her mom about the friend she had who was no longer speaking to her because of a conflict over political views. She compared that story, to another story about her mother in law from her first marriage.

“When I went with my first husband” Filly said, “when we were first dating, and visited his parents house, I was put in the downstairs basement room. His mom, who was like Howard’s mom in “The Big Bang Theory”, got angry when I let her son iron slacks for me, even though he had offered to help me get ready more quickly.”

“She decided that I was hoity toity, and had ironed the slacks for him. Fast forward to a few years later after we had gotten married. I was really sad to be missing the feast, mom, that you prepare for Christmas day, of all the delicious turkey, ham, asparagus casserole, sweet potato casserole, mashed potatoes, peas, cranberry and rolls and pie, because we had agreed to leave my house so we could split time with his family who was only an hour away. You had suggested I take a house gift to his family so I had purchased a lovely flower arrangement for the table for their Christmas day dinner.”

“When we got there though, there was no feast to be had, and there were cold cuts in the kitchen on the counter wrapped in paper, and the shades were drawn on all the windows which were dark even though it was daylight and his mom and sisters were smoking and playing cards in the dark. It was really different from what my family was doing and it was depressing to me. I put the flowers on the counter, and the next day when we came back to visit before leaving and I went to the bathroom, the flowers had been thrown upside down in the trashcan in the bathroom.”

Filly looked to see her mom’s reaction as they walked and thought to herself, “If I could relive that moment, I would have gotten the flowers out of the trash and put them back in the car right then and there, and driven back to my parents house.”

Filly’s mom listened and commented on how weird it was that the mom did not think her son should do any ironing. Filly’s mom had started working when Filly was in high school, and Filly’s dad had ironed his own shirt every day before work, and sometimes Filly had ironed it for him, using a coke bottle with water to sprinkle, and some spray starch.
Ironing was a useful skill.

Then her mom went on to tell her own story about mother in laws. She told that her own mother in law, had not liked that her son had married a Catholic. She wanted her son to continue on as a Methodist, as he did for many years. She showed her displeasure in subtle ways …but still her mom had noticed. Her mom told a story of how her in-laws loved to play bridge with another couple, so she had hand embroidered flowers on all four corners of a lovely bridge table sized cloth and given it as a gift. This was while she was busy being a mom to five little girls. She said that the bridge table cloth was never used and she never even saw it again. So she said that when it came to mother-in-laws shunning, Filly was not alone.

Filly listened. Filly’s dad had taken instruction eventually and had become a Catholic. Then Filly told her mom that the whole time she was married, she tried to communicate with her mother in law with letters and phone calls and photos of her own children, with no response. After she and her first husband got divorced, and he remarried, THAT was when the ex mother-in-law started writing Filly regularly like they were long lost friends and telling her how much she did not like her son’s new wife and how much better Filly had been… Filly had forgiven her long ago just like her mom had forgiven her mother-in-law.

Filly had learned that she could not force another person to like her or approve of her but as long as she lived a life where she approved of herself and her actions as good, the other person’s approval did not matter so much. Her actions and her life spoke volumes more than words. When she quit trying to talk someone into something, and focused on improving her own behavior, she saw that people came around on their own.

Filly felt at the time like putting flowers in front of her mother in law had seemed like a waste of time, like the bible verse of putting pearls before swine. The swine did not see the value in anything that they could not eat. The pearls would be wasted on the swine. But even though she rejected the flowers, the behavior must have made a difference because her mother-in-law responded later in life.

In the same way, the flowers seemed were wasted on someone who chooses darkness over the light. And yet, on the earth, God chooses to give mankind these “pearls” of flowers to bloom and bless people in all walks of life which Filly believed was significant of how God teaches. Those who do not see the natural beauty of blooms are not looking for blessings, and yet they are still able to blessed if they turn away from evil. The pearl will bless a pig when it stops acting like a pig.

Filly smiled knowing that her mother and she shared a love of flowers, Filly photographed them and her mother embroidered and cultivated them. She marveled over the flowers and the way the light revealed in them so many intricate details. What could be learned scientifically from each flower or leaf, was infinitesimal, and the possibilities, which revealed themselves in pathways that seemed miraculous, were yet responsive. Those those who understood and humbled themselves before the beauty of The Creator could then mirror and benefit from the good it represented.

Jesus demonstrated his understanding of good, when he spoke to the fig tree.

Jesus Curses a Fig Tree and Clears the Temple Courts

12 The next day as they were leaving Bethany, Jesus was hungry. 13 Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to find out if it had any fruit. When he reached it, he found nothing but leaves, because it was not the season for figs. 14 Then he said to the tree, “May no one ever eat fruit from you again.” And his disciples heard him say it.

15 On reaching Jerusalem, Jesus entered the temple courts and began driving out those who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves, 16 and would not allow anyone to carry merchandise through the temple courts. 17 And as he taught them, he said, “Is it not written: ‘My house will be called a house of prayer for all nations’[a]? But you have made it ‘a den of robbers.’[b]”

18 The chief priests and the teachers of the law heard this and began looking for a way to kill him, for they feared him, because the whole crowd was amazed at his teaching.

19 When evening came, Jesus and his disciples[c] went out of the city.

20 In the morning, as they went along, they saw the fig tree withered from the roots. 21 Peter remembered and said to Jesus, “Rabbi, look! The fig tree you cursed has withered!”

22 “Have faith in God,” Jesus answered. 23 “Truly[d] I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them. 24 Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. 25 And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

The courts of judges who had turned into a den of thieves, as well as chief priests who did not listen to Christ, were emptied out by Jesus in the past as they would still be emptied in the present if they were illegitimate or for profit. Jesus taught that the power of prayer was not demonstrated by buying or selling church influence. He drove the “moneychangers” out of his house and said that the prayer of the believers would be granted.

For this Filly was so grateful. Happy Mothers day Mom.