The end of the rock god
CRASH!!! The sound could be heard by me all the way upstairs in the back bedroom where I was vacuuming. I ran to the top of the stairs and looked down and saw a lamp, and a treasured item, both on the floor, shattered in pieces. The two children were looking at me to see what I would do.
What WAS I going to do?
The morning had started for me at five am. I got up early because I wanted to get my fifty minute run walk workout in before anyone woke up. I got seven of the eight sprints done when my sister called and we had fun talking about the NOT FUN time she had getting stranded in the airport for several days trying to get to a trip she had planned in San Diego. She did not end up going and took a flight back to NC. and was going to have to reschedule.
Talking to my sisters is the best way I know of to help a workout go by faster. I was grateful for the distraction and her timing was perfect as I had already done most of the running and was on the cool down part.
We talked about how we were both glad we were not on the dating scene ( I am happily married and she is happily single) and she reminisced (tongue in cheek) on how one guy she was supposed to go out with called her and had “your body is a wonderland” playing in the background and said that he was imagining what it would be like on their first date. She cancelled on him. Another date wanted to know where was the weirdest place she had sex. GEEZELOUIZE guys really???? YUCKATOLA
I told my sister that I get excited about having a difficult running workout that I can complete… I get excited about shopping at vintage and thrift stores, and I get excited visiting my mom, sisters or family, and planning outings with little kids. I am perfectly content to have these things as the highlights of my days. My sister agreed and we both decided in our phone conversation that the majority of dating sites are mostly gross and the people who define “relationships” by the number of booty calls, are worthless time wasters.
I went from this adult conversation with my sister to a children's conversation when I got home with awake child number one, about why one should write thank you notes and why one should eat oatmeal for breakfast. To support my wish for children to write gratitude notes, I found a video book about a girl who writes thank you notes, and played it while the kids ate breakfast. Child number one refused to eat oatmeal and I refused to make anything else to eat. SO that child was given a handful of nuts as an alternative until the next meal. Child number two ate both bowls of oatmeal.
I also then got one child to do the note writing and while the other went upstairs and began destructing the play area, so my next plan was to get the kids to help me clean up. I offered each two dollars to entice them to clean their own rooms.
Number one child went about the cleaning with determination and the other complained and offered to put the dolls in their beds for the two dollars but not the rest of the toys. I said no deal. We finally resolved the cleaning options by giving a different room as a chore.
In the meantime I had gotten the robot vacuum running to get the downstairs clean and was distracted by this weird clicking and figured out that it had vacuumed up a necklace and was wrapping it up in a twisted knot.
I emptied it and fixed it and then “pretend drank” the “pretend coffee” one child had made me who was still not helping clean up…french vanilla with cream and sugar. I made at least seven trips up the stairs to take up the stacks at the bottom of the stairs, and noticed that one child was still focused on the dolls and was insisting that the doll’s “outfit” needed to be changed out of PJ's before ANY work could be done.
I brilliantly thought I could use this clothing dilemma as an opportunity to try to get the kids interested in sewing and suggested that they might enjoy watching me do an alteration on some baby clothes to help make the clothes fit the nakey baby so she would have some clothes. No one bit on that suggestion…lol.
I also thought to myself that it might be a useful time to try to do an alteration on the hand me down bra I had been wearing that day for my workout and though it was cotton and absorbent and the right size, after wearing it, I noticed that the elastic has lost its stretch and the bottom half of the bra was not holding everything in like it should and required constant adjusting. (Then again, perhaps it is time for such ill fitting underwear to go to the trash). My running needs all the support I can get LOL.
I had finished sewing the doll outfit all alone and no one learned to sew, and then took the dressed doll upstairs to give to the kids carrying the vacuum at the same time so I only had to make one trip.
For some reason, child number one is like me, and likes order and has to have dolls dressed, babies in beds, barbies sitting at tables in the barbie house for all to be well.
(my daughter says that is why she does not like toys with pieces as she has that same need to keep order amongst the toys. IS that why the Christmas musical about toys is called the nutcracker?? because of the difficulty for moms and kids of keeping toys organized and unbroken? LOL…Our duckie game, for example has probably fifty ducks..and the majority of the ones in our game have somehow found their way to the pool, and of course I had to wade into the pool in the early am after my run and try to collect them from the drains, and the skimmer baskets..the cute little yellow plastic ducks appreciated me I am sure.
The pretend plastic food for the children's pretend kitchen can be found not just in THEIR kitchen, but literally in every drawer and under every sofa. And I walked around for ten minutes at least with the bottom half of a real baby bottle, looking for the top half that I KNEW I had seen somewhere. Child number one likes using the bottle SHE had for her babies.
Speaking of toys and order, when I taught preschool, I remember that each shelf in that preschool had a toy in a bin and the bin had a picture on it of the toy. The kids all knew how to put away the toys. I decided I needed bins and shelves but that is going to have to wait for another day. (thoughts of whitesnake and the song “I don’t know where I’m going but I sure know where I BIN” LOLOL)
So as I was upstairs vacuuming, leaving the dressed doll abandoned on the sofa, that is when I heard the crash.
Here is what happened… the giant pink helium balloon that is now at least four weeks old, droopy and pinched, had been found by number one child and had been thrown over the banister to the bottom floor. The balloon bounced off of the treasured items and the string that was attached to the balloon got stuck and when the second child yanked the balloon. The balloon and string pulled off the items onto the floor with a very loud and resounding crash. I came rushing to the scene.
In the meantime, while the kids were surveying the pieces on the floor and I was cautioning them not to walk because of the glass, the robot vacuum was still furiously trying to vacuum and had somehow acquired the errant balloon by the string and was viciously pulling it behind , sucking it in greedily until, as I watched, the captured balloon exploded.
I do not know why but this was hysterically funny to me. I could not let the kids know I was laughing so I walked into the other room. Yes it was bad what had happened and no I was not happy about it, but the whole situation with dolls and nuts and balloons and the vacuum made for hilarious chaos.
As I was laughing I went and got the trashcan from outside. The treasured item was a rock and no sense “picking up the pieces”.
Joel Olsteen says that people used to worship a rock god and that when they stole the ark of the covenant, that the rock god fell down off the pedestal. They put it back but the next day it fell off again and broke to smithereens and eventually the thieves had to give back the ark covenant to the owners …which they did by letting some cows carry it wherever the cows wanted to go. So maybe the rock breaking is a good sign.
And no need to feel guilty about laughing because Victoria Olsteen today said that joy has to be cultivated. She explained that a lemon tree has the ability to produce lemons but that the lemons have to be cultivated by watering, proper soil, sunlight etc. She said that joy is inside people the same way lemons exist inside a lemon tree and once cultivated, that which is inside can come out and be enjoyed. She said that joy is the key to overcoming difficulties in life and I REALLY agree.
The kids said that they were sorry and I believe they were. They helped clean up the house and order is restored. But I learned that when things get tough, God gives us the grace to laugh and be appropriate in our responses to problems so that we can be good teachers and set good examples.
It is important to take care of the things that we cherish and that are meaningful but it is also important to recognize that people are more important than things.
And children who can laugh at their own mistakes and apologize and try to make restitution, will FO SHO be happier and that is a good thing.