things “renembered”

Filly sat across from Tater, in the cool winter day, again at McDonalds. Tater, her one leg tucked under her, was talking, and eating a piece of pancake without syrup, and drinking her drink by holding the top of the straw like a siphon, and pouring it into her mouth. She was talking about school, and about how someone in her class at lunch had threatened her. And yet she was only in third grade. Which could have made Filly sad, because she only wanted happiness for Tater.

But Tater had laughed it off and her best friend had told the teacher. Her face was animated and her expressions mesmerizing to watch as she told the story about that day at school in the lunch room. Tater was an excellent communicator. She was also smart and had learned the language of her contemporaries at school, “protecting his emo” and “going deep”. And in spite of saying that she felt invisible, when she was at school, Filly knew Tater was impactful. Her view on the world was pure, and her interest in doing right was evident and was beautiful.

As Tater spoke, Filly remembered something…something distant. Like an old memory that was back on a dusty shelf in her mind. Tater said the word “Renembered”. Filly smiled at the mispronunciation. She loved how Tater talked. She talked with confidence. She could breathe… and the easy flowing breath was the memory in Filly’s thinking.

For many years prior, she had worried because Tater had “no air”. She had to rely on a breathing treatment every day and sometimes multiple times a day. She had now finally outgrown that problem. Some would say that the solution to the problem was for her to have the immediate access to the breathing treatment whenever she needed it. That had been part of the plan when Tater was at school and the nurse was always ready. Which had helped a great deal. But the real solution, was for her to not need the treatment at all…for her to breath on her own and not have to work to breathe. To have air, to live.

Filly thought of the song “no air”. It also talked about being out in the water “so deep”. A person could be profoundly sad that Tater had problems in her life to deal with, or they could be profoundly grateful that she now could breathe like a normal child, and never have to work to breathe. It would not make sense though to be sad for the crutch of a breathing treatment that Tater no longer needed.

Filly had just watched a video about a girl who was addicted to meth. It was so depressing to see what a person who could not outgrow their “crutch”, such as the addiction to a drug, looked like. There was no connection to family, no awareness of love, and no remorse for abusive behavior. There were many things that people could be addicted to…like gender ideology, or food preferences, or other things that separated them from God and good. Often times, just like the video, the people who were addicted were abusive to those trying to help them.

In order to help someone who was addicted, the family needed to be ok with seeing that person suffer through withdrawal or removal of their “crutch”. Being sad for them losing their “crutch” is tolerable because the family knows that the person who is able to beat that addiction will again be able to breathe on their own, and to live.
Filly thought of the story of the man in the bible who lay on the ground and had a crutch…never getting up to walk until Jesus told him to. Each person has to give up that crutch in order to walk and live a normal life.

Tater continued to talk animatedly and was excited to meet her new baby sister that her family was adopting.

The birth mother of the child was not going to raise her. A person could be sad, for the mother, but rejoice for the now optimistic outcome for the life of the child, now in a loving family. Sadness for the mistake often keeps the affected person, attached to their “crutch”.

The memory of a mistake, an addiction, or a wrong turn in the road, is like the night, dark and often hard to find the right way. But that memory can be obliterated by the light, the joy of good decisions and freedom from addictions, mistakes or wrong turns.

It would make no sense for Filly to be sad and remember that Tater once needed breathing treatments…that dependency that might have felt good to her, at the time. It made more sense to recognize that Tater was healthier and more independent now, and had been healed of that dependency.

Filly turned towards Mister, who had been constantly trying to interrupt as he jumped up and down in the play area. That day, he had read a book out loud perfectly. He was also a budding artist and loved drawing space creatures. He loved to talk to Filly about flying out to space and had a genuine interest. He was from another country, and Filly could be sad that he was not that interested in the language of his country of origin, or rejoice that he had learned the language of the country he now was a citizen of, and was bright and interested in many things.

Immorality of any kind, is, in the adult world, the “addiction” or the “crutch” that some people choose to not let go of.

But, “None that go unto “her” return again, neither take they hold of the paths of life.”

The randomly chosen bible verse for the day was very clear. To turn away from addictions, and be free. To be able to have a conversation without a crutch, to be able to breathe, to have all the air that was needed without any effort. To live.

The man sitting at the table in the back started talking to Filly and Tater and Mister as well. He was friendly and thoughtful and intelligent. He was also from another country. He was working on getting his citizenship. Filly smiled and listened to him. He moved closer to the table beside hers and said that he made “oil” from RUE plant. He said that it could be rubbed on the skin and healed migraines and knee problems and all kinds of problems. He pulled a bottle of oil out of his pocket and offered it to Filly for free.

Filly liked to be kind and the man seemed genuine. But she did not know him. He was a stranger. She talked about this with the kids after he left. She said that none of them knew what was actually in the bottle. She said that prayer was how she had healed most of her problems and she did not want to rely on drugs.

She told the kids that people could get addicted to something without knowing that it was addictive if they took things that some stranger gave them for free. She showed the kids that even though something sounded harmless or even helpful, that it was not smart to take things from people they did not know. They would RUE the day lol.

They took the bottle the man had left and put it by the door of the business where he said that he worked. It was a tire store. And Filly felt like “using” any kind of crutch was like trying to drive a car with flat tires. Not gonna be a good ride. A free ride is a bad ride. That was what Filly thought.

She collected Tater and Mister and their drinks and they went home. The sun was shining. No night dropping down on any troubled child. Filly smiled and said thank you to God.